Alienation leads to the total rejection of one parent by the child. There is no one definition but there are recognised hallmarks which indicate that alienation is taking place. Commonly, the alienating parent believes they are acting in the interests of the child who increasingly professes that the do not want to spend time with the other parent, and may show distress, anger and fear when faced with contact.
These issues are very polarising and the conflict between the parents escalates to the point that they lose sight of what is best for the child. The reality of the situation may lie more subtly somewhere in the middle ground between the parents.
What Does the Court Think?
Despite the increasing awareness of this issue, there is no approved consensus between the professionals about how to establish the causes, effects and treatments, or even how to identify parental alienation in the child.
With complex and subtle issues at play, it can be a very tricky issue to navigate through the court system. Alienation cases are notoriously long-drawn out and hard to bring to a satisfactory conclusion.
How Will the Court Take My Child’s View Into Account?
The court will usually ask a Cafcass officer or a social worker to do a report into what your child needs. In addition, you may have an independent expert, such as a psychologist, doing further reports.
Your child may be appointed a guardian, which is usually necessary in parental alienation cases. The guardian’s role is to represent your child’s best interests to the court, and so it is important to make sure that the guardian is aware of all the relevant influences on your child.
Your child’s personal involvement will depend on their age and competency. It is possible for them to write or speak directly to the judge; this is not an evidence-gathering exercise, and the judge cannot make decisions based on the content of that conversation, but it is an opportunity for your child to feel heard.
What Can You Do?
- Act Quickly
It is very important to take action as soon as possible to prevent long-term damage to your child’s family relationships, and their psychological health. Prevention is better than cure in these cases. - Get Support
It is important to have the right experts on board from the start, to support you and, crucially, your child. Think about what kind of support your child most needs and who can offer it. There are many targeted family-based therapeutic services available to consider. - Prepare
It isn’t always necessary to go to court but, when it is, you need to be well prepared by the time you make the application. The court process may be slow, but you need to be in a position to drive the case from the outset by knowing your objectives and the evidence which hurts and supports you. Your solicitor can advise you on how to push the court towards effective intervention. It is always helpful to keep records of the relevant information; missed contacts, harassing phone calls, concerning comments, etc. and have these ready to discuss with your advisor.
You can also review the Cafcass guidance on parental alienation cases as this will let you know how the matter will be approached by the reporting officer and what issues to bring to their attention. - Keep the Battle at Court
Typically, each parent makes allegations about the behaviour of the other. How these allegations are dealt with by the court and reporting professionals is very important. It may seem to be asking the impossible, but avoid fighting it out directly with your ex. If the hostility is entrenched, you will achieve nothing more than causing further arguments. Where counselling or therapy have a chance of being successful then take this opportunity, but make use of professionals when you need them.
In some cases the court can impose penalties on a parent. Where penalties against the alienating parent may have some effect you can seek to impose these, when appropriate. - Make Your Case
Carefully consider what outcome you believe is best for the child. The court case is not about winning, or proving the other parent wrong, but about finding what will work for your child, in all the practical realities of the situation. Consider all the circumstances honestly and focus on what will be best for your child, taking them as they are.
It is clear that parental alienation can cause great harm to a child, as can the litigation between parents which often ensues. It is important to remember that the court is not interested in playing the blame game between ex-partners but ultimately aims to work out what is best for the child.
If you believe that your child is at risk and you need to take action then contact our family law experts on 01279 755777 or fill in our online enquiry form.